He could pull away and make things worse. But it would be counterproductive.

(Cullen is well aware of what's really bothering him. It's not knowing what to do about it that's the problem.)

So instead Cullen does his best to slip his arms around Alistair -- to cling in some fashion -- and says, barely audible, "I want you as yourself. Always have. Always will."

(Cullen gets to say 'always.')