[sandbox]

[bringspeopletogether]

Back to Skyhold. Back to work.

Alistair resumes training with the Chargers a few days after his and Cullen's return; the company got back from Halamshiral just before the Basin group showed up, Bull explains, so he was giving them a rest before picking up exercises again. Krem fills Alistair in on all the details as they're exchanging blows. Some of it is just Orlesian Worst Game Ever nonsense, but since it ends with a whole lot of shamefaced nobles with no mercenaries to their names, Alistair's pretty damn pleased.

(Maybe he can get the new mercenaries in on his plan to dress up the training dummies in Orlesian garb. Hmmmmmm.)

Cullen's in a war room meeting by the time Alistair's done. He throws some water on his face and heads for the kitchens -- maybe he can split a small meal with Kieran before Morrigan's return.

Comments

[bringspeopletogether]

Right. Yes.

(He can do this.)

Just as carefully, he gathers Kieran into his arms. Kieran's no heavier than a large pack; Alistair can balance him easily enough on one hip. The lad shifts again, with a small sigh, and winds his arms around Alistair's neck as if by instinct.

Alistair doesn't move for the ladder right away: he shuts his eyes again, takes the span of a few breaths to wrest his composure back into place.

Then, slowly, he begins his one-handed ascent to their quarters.

[howtoactfereldan]

Just in case, Cullen thinks, it'll be a good plan to stay at the foot of the ladder.

He folds his arms loosely, looking up, waiting.

(And hoping that they managed to get some kind of pallet put together so Cullen can get at least a few hours in his own bed.)

[bringspeopletogether]

Fortunately, they did. Once Alistair's crested the top -- and taken another second to ensure he won't topple over -- he shuffles to the stacked bedrolls laid alongside their bed. Kieran gets a pillow, and a fur tucked around him, before Alistair smooths a gentle hand over his hair and whispers a subaudible goodnight.

When he straightens up, he wobbles a little on his feet.

Good thing his own bed's right there.

[howtoactfereldan]

Once Alistair clears the top, Cullen comes up after, as swiftly and quietly as he can. While Alistair busies himself with Kieran, Cullen methodically removes the rest of his armor, piece by piece.

Only when he's down to linen shirt and trousers does he remove his boots. Then Cullen settles back against the headboard with a deep sigh.

It's always easier to keep going. Resting is dangerous. But even if they're on heightened alert -- there's no telling how long that state will take, one way or another. The trick is not to think too much.

[bringspeopletogether]

Alistair pulls off his boots and joins Cullen at the headboard. One hand seeks out Cullen's; a moment later, he rests his head on his shoulder.

This is real, he reminds himself. You're as safe as is possible to be.

[howtoactfereldan]

Cullen works his free arm around Alistair's shoulders.

For Alistair's ears only:

"We're prepared. Fortified. No news. At this point, that's good news. You can rest."

[bringspeopletogether]

Alistair shakes his head, just a little.

Mumbled: "Maybe in a bit."

[howtoactfereldan]

Cullen nods.

(And doesn't say I might like to.)

[bringspeopletogether]

As if hearing Cullen's unspoken thoughts: "I'll keep watch if you want to sleep."

[howtoactfereldan]

Cullen shakes his head a little. "Maybe in a while."

If things go badly --

He'd rather be awake and present right now. For a while. That's all.

[bringspeopletogether]

Alistair cracks a lopsided smile, despite himself. "I'm very glad for the company, then."

He tightens his hold on Cullen's hand.

[howtoactfereldan]

"We're all right for now, Alistair."

Quiet, as he weaves their fingers together.

"Rest when you can."

[bringspeopletogether]

He draws a long breath. Lets it out slowly. His eyes are starting to sting: never a good sign.

(The leaves above them look too green for this hour as they reflect back the light of the Breach.)

"If I doubt," he mumbles, half to himself and half to Cullen, "it's a good thing."

[howtoactfereldan]

A soft, rumbly laugh.

"Yes."

[bringspeopletogether]

Cullen's laughter loosens a couple of the knots in Alistair's back. He sighs -- not quite as trembly, any more -- and leans against him more heavily.

His eyes stay on the hole in the roof.

[howtoactfereldan]

Cullen gives it a minute.





"Looking at it won't make it easier," he murmurs. "Learned that in Haven. Right up close."

[bringspeopletogether]

"I don't know what else to do."

One corner of his mouth tugs up, wry.

"Except rest, but that won't happen yet."

[howtoactfereldan]

"Could light a candle, put it in a corner, try describing what the shadows look like."

[bringspeopletogether]

Alistair snorts a weak laugh.

"Might wake Kieran," he says.

[howtoactfereldan]

"If he didn't wake when two grown men were tossing him around like a sack of flour, he's out."

Cullen gently ruffles Alistair's hair.

"I'll take that to mean you just don't want to."

[bringspeopletogether]

"I suppose," he mumbles.

Another beat passes. Then Alistair lifts his head, shifting to face Cullen in full.

"Listen." He frees his hand so he can touch Cullen's cheek. "If things end up...ending. If Corypheus wins, or if this illusion falls apart, even if this has, has all been some thrall -- it's the happiest I can ever remember being. You've made me so happy, Cullen. Every moment of this has been -- beyond worth it."

His throat starts to lock up again. He swallows; pushes through it.

"Thank you, for everything you've done. Everything you are. I love you."

[howtoactfereldan]

Well. He --

Cullen takes in a shaky breath. Lets it out.

He touches his forehead to Alistair's.

"Not an illusion. Not some thrall." Rough.

"And one day you'll listen, when I say there's no need for thanks."

[bringspeopletogether]

A choked laugh, with less humor than he'd like.

"I think the world may end first."

[howtoactfereldan]

"But not today, my love." With quiet conviction. "Not today."

[bringspeopletogether]

And he was doing so well at maintaining his composure.

...All right, he wasn't. At all. But at that, Alistair gives up on maintaining it entirely, wrapping his arms around Cullen as he buries his face against his shoulder.